Swimming with Benjamin

I took Benjamin swimming today, while Hannah had her Gardening class.

Poor little guy. He wasn't himself, to start. He went to bed far too late last night, 11pm, slept till 8, napped 10:15-11 or so, then we were swimming by 1 o'clock. That isn't enough sleep for a baby.

He was unsure, when we entered the water. Clung to me, a little stressed, not a big fan of being dipped into the pool. I tried to warm him up to it all, a bit of splashing, some currents, bubbles, talking sweetly about swimming. What worked? Setting up rubber duckies along a wall for him to knock over, into the current rushing on the other side. ATTACK!

By the end, he was happy. Splashing, swishing, throwing in the air. Catching toys, throwing them back. We met some new friends to chat with, maybe we'll see them next time.

Hannah enjoyed her class. Today was about dragonflies. She had brought along a half-eaten carrot, unpeeled and uncut, and sunglasses. As we left the class, I hear her in the backseat,

"I didn't tell my teacher that I bit my tongue. I'll tell her next week, it'll be a surprise!"

She had bit her tongue while eating a grilled cheese at lunchtime. Blood and all. Seems okay now.

Andrew found a rat living in his car's air intake. I texted the neighbour and she came over to investigate with us. The rat had built a big nest of laurel leaves and the car's denim blue insulation. He removed a panel and started cleaning it out. Only then did the rat leave. After removing about a shoebox worth of material, he discovered the two pink, newborn rat babies. No wonder the mama didn't want to leave so soon. I felt really bad for her. She chose a seemingly perfect place, away from predators, safe and warm. Nesting material nearby. Spent all that time building a nest. And here we go, destroying her nest and letting her babies die.

What is odd to me, is the fact that she was probably staying in there quite often, to take care of the babes. She may've been going to the train station with Andrew every day, then returning home at night. But what if? What if he scared her out and drove off? Or if she had been out gathering snacks when the car left? Her babies would go with it, they'd have no mama. That's not good either.

I went away for the first time this past weekend. I hadn't had a night without children since before Hannah was born. It was nice to be myself for a bit, alone in the world. But I didn't sleep well. I missed my home, my bed, my bathroom, my kitchen. I appreciated all the food and snacks provided, food I didn't have to cook myself, but that too: I like having my kitchen and just drifting in and out as I please. Probably gained 5 lbs in that one day. Pretty sure the lady in the hot tub, the afternoon before leaving, asked when my baby was due. Food baby. Fourteen months ago, ma'am. He's at home.

It was a Church retreat. I've been going to the weekly mom's group at the church for almost 4 years now. Sometimes I go on Sunday, though I haven't lately. Or I go to Saturday speaker events. I enjoy the time for quiet reflection on life, family, the world, and our place in it. Singing, shared joy, emotions, contemplation.

I was happy to see the kids again. I was happy to see the baby. And nurse the baby. Even at just 4 nursing sessions a day, 2 per side, 29 hours away from baby isn't comfortable.

And they're cute, of course.

Tonight, Andrew was hosing the rat pee out of his car, under the hood. The hose was hooked up to the outdoor tap, but dripped a little. Benjamin was adorable, stick in hand, trying to reach his tongue and mouth under the drips to get some water. He also tried putting in the stick and catching the water on it.

Stick is Ben's favourite toy. He always finds stick. Tonight he found big stick, and the big dogs wanted big stick too.

Burnt fingers

So Ben burnt his hand tonight.

I turned my back for a minute, after putting cookies in the oven. I was trying to clear the countertop and put things in the sink. I hear the oven door creak open, and don't clue in for a few seconds til Ben puts his hand in and screams.

It's just 1st degree, I guess hands are pretty tough. There are blisters on 4 finger tip pads, and down his forefinger, and a bigger one on the side of his hand. Two little cut-type spots on either side of the hand. He screamed for an hour and a bit. Andrew came home and helped hold him while I composed myself to deal with an evening of upset baby and no assistance. Ben has passed out on the couch now, with a cold rag wrapped around his lil hand. I held him for about an hour while watching Amazing Race, just to make sure he was happy and not hurting.

Poor darling.

I'm glad we knew the cold rag method, instead of just trying to run his hand under water. We learned that when Hannah had her burn. He is visibly relieved when the rag is put on his hand, and would start to nod off to sleep. Finally fell into his evening slumber.

I was RIGHT FREAKIN' THERE, not 4 feet away. I guess I could've prevented it by keeping him in the Ergo all day (ha, ha ha ha) or by making Hannah take care of him and keep him out of the kitchen any time the oven is in use. What else can you do? Kids get underfoot.

Hopefully this lesson is learned. He loves to open the dishwasher, and when he learned the oven was easier sometimes, he started to do that too. We didn't encourage it. Yet here we are.

It's the sort of thing Hannah never did. She liked the dishwasher and all, but I think Ben has a little bit stronger of an explorer in him.

Ben, with a flour moustache over his Santa beard pajamas.

A little person turns 1

Today was Benjamin's real birthday.

It's hard to believe that was a year ago: so far yet not far at all, that he was born, that he was a 'tiny' 9lb 10.5oz newborn. I remember most of it, the labour, the pushing, the warm, wet baby with the brown spot on his chest. It didn't feel the same as when I had Hannah. It was calmer, happier, less intense. Still intense, but less so. He was born, and I put Andrew on duty right away. I was going to sleep. And little Ben slept so well, that little brown baby.

He would cry when sister held him or manhandled him. He still does, but less than he used to. It's their thing. He smiles a lot more when she plays with him now.

He is becoming such a little person. There's something about the walking that makes him seem so much more like a little boy, rather than a baby.

Andrew was sweeping the floor. Ben grabbed the child's broom we have, and went to help him sweep. Though Andrew discouraged Ben playing in the dirt pile, I was so pleased to see him imitating us.

Ben was throwing the ball and balloon in the living room. He spun around a few times, then continued walking. He went and got Hannah's water bottle, drank out of it, and replaced it in a different location, upright. Multiple times.

A little person.

First thing this morning, I gave the kids yogourt to keep them busy. Turned into a huge mess. Had to take a shower with Ben, who had pear yogourt dripping down his head and pajamas. Naughty sister! She jumped in the bath too. When we returned to the kitchen, she even helped clean the floor at my request.

We went to the park today. He loves the swing. It was so warm out, none of us wore coats. Maybe 15C, but sunny too. We saw a blue heron. Ben ran around in the pebbles a bit.

He napped well. We napped together from 12-2, then he slept again from 4:30-5:30.

Hannah fell asleep too, after that excursion to the park. I had nursed Ben in the bed to lay him down. It was really quiet in the rest of the house when I came out of my room. I found Hannah in the bathroom, light on and door closed, sitting on the toilet. I asked if she needed help, a wipe or something. She said no. So I let her be. 10 minutes later, she was still silent in the bathroom.

She had fallen asleep on the toilet. She was slumped forward, chest to knees, hair hanging down, snoring a little. Naked bum still hovering over the bowl. Lest she fall forward and have a nasty wake-up with that unwiped bottom, I gave her a gentle wipe and helped her to bed. She napped.

I woke her up to go to Andrew's rock event this evening, so she could see Nanny. She managed to get a little excited about it as we got in the car, but once again, fell asleep. Poor thing.

Why was she up til 10, and Ben til 11:15? Because that's how it works in our house. We didn't even eat proper family meals today. I made crepes for breakfast, but Andrew and I ate most of them, standing. Hannah had none. Ben had a broken one, which he jammed in his face walking around the kitchen. We listened to the oldies and slowly made them all.

Cathie came by yesterday, admiring the Benjamin on our front door. She even took a picture, I guess she'll show her daughter.

And Ben. Oh Ben. He has this trick, where he sticks out his tongue. The person he's with, me, I copy him. Then he tries to grab my tongue. Ha, ha, Benjamin.

He was even smiling in the mirror today, like, a normal child's smile, not the baby's open mouth joy face.

Benjamin's first birthday

We had Ben's first birthday party today. He was napping when Grandpa and Grammy arrived, and woke up as the rest of the guests arrived. He was running around and around from living room to kitchen and back, running circles. Kicking balloon like a ball. He went to Hannah's kitchen and got her wooden knife, then came back and started running around and slashing guests with the biggest open-mouth smile on his face. It was his joke. He did it to everyone he liked, both on purpose and by accident as he burst past them. Caius and Hannah grabbed the sword and shield and the chase was on. When presented with his cake, and the single candle in the middle, he had a look of awe. He didn't blow it, despite urgings from Bubby. Hannah held his hands down so he couldn't touch the candle. After Hannah blew it out for him, he dug into the raspberries, and managed to eat most of them before I cut the cake. Hannah helped him a little.

He managed to rip some paper off his presents, before the other vultures got in there. He's starting to get it. But he was getting tired by this point in time.

Hannah now has a Benjamin next to her bed, "So I don't miss him" she says.

After all of my family had left, Andrew, his brother, and dad, went for a walk with the three big kids on their shoulders. Hannah didn't want everyone to go home, but it was time. She wore her Anna costume and said her goodbyes. Cousin Autmo went through her dress-up box and came up with a tooth fairy costume. She was also scared of Andrew a little because of the time he wore the mask and lurched about.

Oatmeal

I always visit Hannah before going to bed. Last night I give her sleeping little cheek a kiss. She wakes up a bit. "Mama, I'm hungry." "I'll get you something." I return with a pear, then go brush by teeth. When I come back, she's going back to sleep. "Mama, oatmeal for breakfast." "But I'm making waffles." "No, oatmeal." I've made it twice this past week. Her appetite must be back, because she just devours it.

Christmas. Walking.

Ben has been getting his top teeth in for the past few weeks. He's also been on and off with colds since October.

And he is walking!! Yesterday was 2-3 steps in between things. Today was many steps, travelling about 6 feet to land on mama or nanny, sister, bubby or dada. By the new year, he'll be a little terror. Oh wait, he already is!

He's eating everything in sight. We feed him. With guests over today, he cruised all around the table, grabbing at things. Blueberries, crackers, pickles. At Oma's the other day, he was eating Kythe's baking. He started with a rather hard chocolate biscotti, and grabbed a shortbread with the other hand. I put the shortbread back down and moved the baking. He surfed around the table, and found the exact piece of shortbread and determinedly ate it.

Oh, the cookies. We left cookies out for Santa, who took a bite of the shortbread, and one of the gingerbread. And there's Ben in his Santa pajamas finishing them off the next morning.

Hannah was barfing. She was up in the night, Christmas morning, twice with the pukes. The whole family slept in til 11:15am, Christmas morning. Though Hannah did call through my door at 6:45 to excitedly and sweetly let me know Santa had come and left stockings and presents. We opened some, starting after we were all up. Then after a smoothie, on request, it started again. Barf. Poor girl. We took an afternoon hiatus on present opening. She went back to bed. Mama went to get some Gravol and ginger ale, some Lysol spray to keep the bugs at bay.

Christmas dinner with the family was cancelled, much to our disappointment. We four stayed home, while the other four had theirs elsewhere. We all still made what we intended to, just at separate houses. It was a most wonderful dinner we made.

I understand not wanting to catch the barfs. And kids share their germs freely. I just really didn't want to cancel Christmas dinner, all on one little girl's upset tummy. From facebook and some moms I talk to, it sounds like it's a common occurrence this time of year, when kids just get so excited, and eat too many treats and strange things, and maybe are pushed a little too hard and get run down. But we had Christmas, even if it was quiet. We saw some family today, and we'll see more later this week. Maybe we'll look back fondly at the quiet joy of just being us four, for Ben's first Christmas.

We did get a new camera.

Hannah's illness has passed. We are a little concerned she hasn't been eating much lately though. I'll have to make some more dinners she likes, salmon, rice, broccoli and such.

What Santa going to say

What Santa going to say: Elsa and Anna and a snowflake and is this one Anna with the blue dress only? or is this one Anna with the blue dress with flowers on it and with a cape and also they're in a snowflake and so they are - I think this is Elsa with only the blue dress. Okay. Bye Santa. That is all my words.